2005-02-03 - 2:42 p.m.
The always lovely and very funny rhidundantx2 forced me to do this…. So feel free to blame her.
1. What is the total amount of music files on your computer?
I don’t have any music files on my computer. None. Zip. Zilch. Nadda.
I know, I know. This makes me a huge internet loser and I can no longer eat lunch with the cool kids at the cool internet lunch table anymore.
Fine. I’ll just sit quietly over here by myself.
I didn’t want to sit with you anyhow. Even if you asked me I just say “No way, loser” and then maybe when I’m over here all by myself I’d get hurt and maybe even die and then you’d all be upset and cry and say “Ohhh, why didn’t we let Andy sit with us? Ohh why…”
Yea. That’s it. Losers.
2. What are the last cd’s you have bought (or been given.)
Marcia Ball: “Hot Tamale Baby”
Jimmy Buffet: “License to Chill”
Artic Andy and the Polar Bears: “He So Smart”
Herb Albert and the Tijuana Brass Band: “Greatest Hits”
3. What is the Last Song you Listened to Before taking this survey?
I don’t listen to music in the car and only listen to music at home while in the back yard, and then it’s typically background music or music to drink by. I honestly can’t recall the last song I intentionally listened to.
I was in my wife’s car the other day and she has her radio set to the local drive time station. You know the station: every major city has at least one. It’s usually 2 lame guys cracking each other up by making fun of local politicians, doing prank calls and the occasion music parody song.
When they do play actual music it’s usually some Beatles tune. So the last song I listened to was probably oh, I dunno, let’s say “Obla-Dee” by the Beatles. Who knows? It could have easily been some Speed Metal Band. I wasn’t paying attention. I was looking out the window thinking about boobies.
However, the last song I sang was “Mac the Knife”. Does that count? I was at a very fancy dinner party the other night and my ADD was kicking in. Just when I thought I was about to stab my eyes out with the salad fork from sheer boredom, I spied a Karaoke Machine in the living room. Yay! I was saved. I was up from the table quicker than you could say “Broken Leaded Crystal Water Goblet”.
You would have never guessed that I never did Karaoke before, or that I was never given professional voice lessons. In fact, in grade school the nuns would make me stand in back and just “pretend to sing” during class recitals. Can you believe that?
Stupid nuns.
Anyhow, I tell you what. I was on fire. I was the life of the party. I sat on top of the grand piano, loosened my tie. I was slugging Jack Daniels and belting out songs and jokes all night long. I could tell by the looks on the other guest faces that they had never heard or seen anything like it. They were captivated.
Mental note to self: Don’t tell the pig fucking joke over a microphone if the hostess has little kids at home.
Mental note to self #2:Don’t tell retarded baby jokes if hostess has a retarded child.Microphone or no microphone.
4. What are 5 songs you listen to often or that mean a lot to you?
Pachelbel's Canon in D Minor: Theme music to a very special event in my life.
Angels Among Us: My wedding song. Yup. My wife loves C/W.
The Girl from Ipanema: Reminds me of a special person
Highway to Hell: I was involved in a horrific car crash (a man was decapitated) when this was playing. “ Hotel-Motel Take it on the run” – BANG- Cars were flying through the air. It was very surreal.
Piano theme to the “Exorcist”: I love playing this on autumn days.
Karaoke Anyone?
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